A Desire for Family (stories of my kids)

Yesterday while driving into the children’s home I noticed a young woman walking and holding hands with little Hyo, one of our 1st grade boys. Hyo had the biggest smile on his face and waved at me. Later during dinner I asked Hyo who she was and he beamed at me and said, “My mom.” He told me that they went and had some food together outside the children’s home and visited his school before coming back. The little boy was so happy.

Shortly after dinner I asked our manager about Hyo’s mom. She had Hyo when she was still in high school and Hyo came to our children’s home as a baby. She had visited a couple times when he was really young, but it had been over three years since she had last visited. Likely Hyo had no memory of her before this visit. My manager told me that his mom is in the process of potentially taking him back home, but she first needs to pass some tests with social welfare and prove that she is mentally, emotionally, and financially well enough to take care of Hyo. As much as we love little Hyo at the home, our hope is that he will be able to go back and live with his birth mom and that she will take good care of him.

Hyo’s joy both blessed me and broke my heart at the same time. My heart was broken at the thought of all the other kids at the home who don’t have a mom or dad to go back to. There is such desire within them for family. After Hyo mentioned his mom at dinner another young boy at the table asked the dorm mom when his mom will be visiting. Sadly he has no record of his parents, but he is too young to understand that yet. So his dorm mom just responded, “I don’t know…”

While in America I shared with my home church about our soccer camp last year and the impact on the boys. I shared how one of the toughest boys at my home, a 6th grader named Kee, was greatly impacted by the camp and did really well there. Sadly, I found out today that Kee was caught stealing someone’s cell phone at a local computer room (like an arcade but with computers). A police officer came by the home and spoke with him and the staff, and Kee’s dorm dad who is new at the home was pretty distraught. He has tried disciplining Kee but hasn’t had much effect. He expressed to me in exasperation, “I can’t do anything… but… pray.” I told him that it was good that Kee was caught and that hopefully this will wake him up. I also told him that prayer is powerful and that Kee is in God’s hands. I told him there have been other difficult kids who have been caught by the police who grew up and turned out well. I then prayed for the dorm dad and after the prayer his demeanor changed and he was very thankful.

Later in the evening after basketball practice I pulled Kee aside and spoke with him for a while. I told him my first memories of him when he was just 1 years old and affirmed him for how he has grown. I shared about the soccer camp last year and how well he did and how the volunteers were blessed by him. I also shared with him about a past boy who had a similar background as Kee and who ended stealing and lying and eventually running away in middle school and going through really hard years alone. I told Kee to make good choices and to not ruin his life. I mentioned some of the other older boys who did well while living at the home and who are now doing well outside of it. Last, I told Kee that I care for him. I told him even though he doesn’t have family by blood, he has family in me and the dorm parents and the kids he has grown up with. I told him I’ve remained connected with the kids who have graduated and left the home and that I’ll want to remain connected with him. I told him that I’ve been with him during his first 11 years and I want to be with him for the next. That I look forward to seeing how he will grow. I told him I love him and want the best for him.

It was the last part that I think sank in the most for him. Kee has grown up in the home since he was an infant. He has had many different dorm moms and dorm dads that have taken care of him. A dorm dad that had been with him for the longest amount of time recently had to quit, so the new dorm dad has stepped in. Every new dorm parent is another reminder to the kids that they don’t have family; they don’t have people truly committed to them. With new dorm parents the kids tend to rebel and it takes time before they become comfortable with them. These kids are longing for family. They want to have connection with someone, a connection that they can trust will last. Without it they feel lonely, afraid, and even angry. I pray that Kee will find family through his new dorm dad, through me, and others at the home, and that he will make better choices and be the good kid I know God made him to be.

Prayer requests…

– Please pray for Kee that he will have conviction of his wrongdoing and that his attitude will improve. Please pray that he will receive the love of family through his dorm dad, me, and the others at the children’s home. Please pray that he will become the wonderful person I know God made him to be.

– Please pray for Hyo and all the other kids at my home that they also will experience family. Please pray that these kids’ hearts will be open to the love of God and that they will be able to hear His voice and experience His love, joy, and peace.

– Please pray for the dorm parents, manager, and director that they will all have strong hope and love for the children. Pray that they will rely on the Lord and keep their joy in Him through every struggle with the kids.

Thank you all for your prayers! God bless!
John-Michael

P.S. This blog entry was my most recent e-mail update to my prayer supporters. If you would like to receive future prayer e-mails please contact me at comequickly@gmail.com.